Introduction

Today's topic is what I often say to God in prayer. Last Tuesday's prayer meeting, I was singing hymns and weeping. I am a tearful pastor. Being a pastor is really tiring because I often worry about every oppressed brother and sister, praying for each one of them. The work God has given me is to shepherd His flock. Looking back on the road I have walked, it is all tears. Sometimes I really feel frustrated. Why are they always deceived by the devil? Why do they love work more than loving God? Why do they have to suffer before they come to pray?

There is a sister who has walked with me for a long time. She loves the Lord very much, but now she is about to leave. I am really heartbroken, so I personally minister to this sister. Many years ago, this sister's leg was attacked by the devil and was very painful. I prayed with her, but she could not be delivered. I pleaded with God, and God revealed to me to poke her Zusanli acupuncture point. I did what God said, and her leg relaxed in a few seconds. Another time, the demon in her aunt's body wanted to run into her body, and her back and shoulders were extremely painful. We ministered to her and delivered her. Later, this sister embarked on the road of service, but she valued service more than her own growth, so she was very painful and wanted to leave the church. Last night, the demon inside this sister was cast out, and the demon screamed.

For every oppressed brother and sister, I try my best to minister. It is really tiring. When I am tired, I pray to God, God, may you remember me. I really want to return to you. Yesterday I was really happy when I saw this sister come to church. I really do not care whether there is one more or one less person in the church. What I worry about are those oppressed brothers and sisters.

Also yesterday, a brother whom I had pastored, from whom I had cast out many demons, but he was deceived and left two years ago. There is no way, if I want to minister to this brother, I can only have my brothers and sisters minister to that sister. Thank the Lord that our brothers and sisters have the ability to fight and deliver this sister.

I once advised that brother, could he follow me to fight and win? But he was deceived by the devil and has been involved in lawsuits for the past two years, which is very hard. Last night I ministered until very late, and I said to God, my sermon稿子has not been written yet. But it does not matter, ministering and pastoring brothers and sisters is more important. That brother told me that he had been to many churches and many fellowships, but no one cared about him or solved his problems. Only me, as long as he came to me, I would minister.

Scripture

Remember me, O my God, concerning this, and do not wipe out my good deeds that I have done for the house of my God, and for its services. (Nehemiah 13:31)

Prayer

Lord Jesus, may you raise up a group of leaders who love you among us. Open our eyes and let us see the needs of this generation and the souls in darkness. May you cause those indifferent and backsliding brothers and sisters to return to your holy mountain. May you raise up your people, church, and leaders, and let this generation see the glory.

Scripture Background

Nehemiah was a Jew who was doing well in the court of the Persian Empire. In fact, he could enjoy his wealth and glory, but people returning from Jerusalem told him the current situation in Jerusalem: the Israelites were being bullied and the walls were destroyed. Nehemiah wept and prayed to God, saying:

And they said to me, “The survivors who are left from the captivity in the province are there in great distress and reproach. The wall of Jerusalem is also broken down, and its gates are burned with fire.” When I heard these words, I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven. And I said, “O Lord God of heaven, the great and awesome God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open, to hear the prayer of your servant that I now pray before you day and night for the people of Israel your servants, confessing the sins of the people of Israel, which we have sinned against you. Even I and my father’s house have sinned. We have acted very corruptly against you and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, and the rules that you commanded your servant Moses. Remember the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying, ‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples, but if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though your outcasts are in the uttermost parts of heaven, from there I will gather you and bring you to the place that I have chosen, to make my name dwell there.’ They are your servants and your people, whom you have redeemed by your great power and by your strong hand. O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.” Now I was cupbearer to the king. (Nehemiah 1:3-11)

After Nehemiah finished praying, he went to the emperor and asked the king for leave. He looked sad. The king noticed his sadness and asked him what was wrong. He said:

Why should my face not be sad, when the city, the place of my fathers’ tombs, lies in ruins, and its gates have been destroyed by fire? (Nehemiah 2:3)

The king asked him what he wanted. He replied:

And I said to the king, “If it pleases the king, and if your servant has found favor in your sight, that you send me to Judah, to the city of my fathers’ tombs, that I may rebuild it.” (Nehemiah 2:5)

Then the king happily sent him. He returned to Jerusalem, facing attacks and ridicule from the people around him, and the people of Israel were also difficult to manage. But disregarding all difficulties, he spent twelve years, using all his俸禄savings, fighting and building the walls of Jerusalem. He ministered and built at the same time, which was very hard. He pleaded with God, May you remember me.

Selfishness and Living a Small Life is Not the Way

Serving people is not a good job, because the Israelites wanted to live a small life and did not like change. As a result, the walls were destroyed and people were oppressed. Nehemiah had a great burden to do such a thing. Nehemiah was not just doing something when he had nothing to do. This was his burden. Serving and pastoring means having to offend them and help them remove their bad habits. Among our brothers and sisters, there is no one who has not been offended by me. I am very concerned about whether they can be delivered.

The history of the Kingdom of Israel and the Kingdom of Judah: the Kingdom of Israel lived a small life and was destroyed by Assyria; more than a hundred years later, the Kingdom of Judah was also destroyed by Babylon. The Israelites were taken captive and ruled by the Babylonian and Persian Empires successively. Later, God moved the king of the Persian Empire to send Ezra back to build the temple and Nehemiah back to build the walls. Why did the Israelites encounter such captivity? Because the Israelites were really selfish and willing to live their own small lives.

Yesterday I said to that brother, Why are you willing to be in a church that cannot help you? When people in the church have needs, you also serve superficially. When you encounter problems yourself, no one comes to help you. That brother said, What you said, our church does not say; what our church says, you do not say. But indeed, when I encounter problems, only you help me.

How many brothers and sisters are still selfish in their hearts today? Just wanting to live their own good lives?

In the past, there was a sister who would have a high fever once a year. I desperately prayed for her, which was very hard. I told her, Sister, as I serve you today, you must also serve other brothers and sisters. Where is this sister today? She is living her own small life. If you do not serve God, you will serve the enemies God sends.

There is a sister whose son and daughter-in-law used to be very miserable. They were turned around in the church and then went back to their own small lives. This sister really hopes that her son and daughter-in-law can come back. Her son used to have very bad grades and could not find a job. I helped him revise his resume, trained him for interviews, and prayed with him until he was completely transformed. Then he kicked me away. Many people, when they are in a very miserable situation, shout, Serve me! Serve me! After their situation improves, they kick me away.

The history of the Israelites really gives us a great shock! The Israelites in that era offered the worst and inferior animals as sacrifices, did not tithe, were selfish, built their own houses but let God's temple lie in ruins.

I pray to God, may you raise up people who love you among us and lead us to build a victorious church. What will the church look like when I leave one day? I long for our leaders to be leaders who serve at a cost, disregarding people's feelings, pleasing God alone, and not being afraid of offending people. If you have such leaders, you are blessed! What can selfishness gain? Nothing at all.

Serving God Requires Sacrifice, Even Offending People

A sister and her husband flew all the way from Canada to examine me, as they were disappointed with many churches they had visited. Praise God, I am able to withstand scrutiny. They played recordings from our website for their Christian friends, who heard something completely different from what they heard, thinking I was arrogant and that I believed no other church was good except mine. Actually, I long to leave this world and return to God as soon as possible.

“And now, behold, I know that none of you among whom I have gone about proclaiming the kingdom will see my face again. Therefore I testify to you this day that I am innocent of the blood of all, for I did not shrink from declaring to you the whole counsel of God. Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood. I know that after my departure fierce wolves will come in among you, and will not spare the flock; and from among your own selves will arise men speaking twisted things, to draw away the disciples after them. Therefore be alert, remembering that for three years I did not cease night or day to admonish every one with tears. And now I commend you to God and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified. I coveted no one's silver or gold or apparel. You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my necessities and to those who were with me. In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” (Acts 20:25-35 ESV)

Some say, “Those who say they are humble are definitely not humble.” But Paul indeed spoke of his own humility in his letters, and Moses also said of himself, Now the man Moses was very meek. Serving brothers and sisters must remember that God will remember us.

Recently, I disciplined a leader whose service was full of womanly kindness, serving according to human intentions. I removed her and had another leader serve her. Praise God, she knew what I was doing, and she did not discern good and evil.

There are too few who love God, too few who are strong to be leaders, and too few who dare to deal with people's problems with strength. We have a sister among us who has cancer, her abdomen is full of water, and she often needs to have it drained. Why? Because her mind is filled with selfish thoughts. Repent! Do not follow the customs of this world, do not follow the world's logic. Without strong leaders, people's condition is like Jerusalem in the days of Nehemiah.

When Nehemiah returned to Jerusalem, he found that some people had turned the rooms in the temple into their own dwellings, making a mess of the temple. This was done by the local thugs, but Nehemiah did not hesitate to offend them and was determined to cleanse the temple. There, the Levites had no one to support them, so they went back to till the land. Why was this happening? Is it because while I am here, the brothers and sisters are still like this; one day when I am gone, no one demands it, and the brothers and sisters will go back to living their small lives?

Driven by the Love of God, Serve God Wholeheartedly

And one of the sons of Jehoiada, the son of Eliashib the high priest, was the son-in-law of Sanballat the Horonite. Therefore I chased him from me. Remember them, O my God, because they have desecrated the priesthood and the covenant of the priesthood and the Levites. (Nehemiah 13:28-29 ESV)

In that era, Nehemiah dared to confront the dark forces of the local area, and he prayed to God, Remember me, O my God, for good. I think what I am doing today sets a good example for the brothers and sisters. One day when I return to God, may God call me a faithful and good servant. This path of building the church, the path of serving, is hard, but God will surely remember us.

Just now I heard the testimony of my brother, who came among us indebted, sick, and desolate, but was transformed among us. To let the captives be released and the oppressed be set free, this is what God has us do. If you have a heart that loves God, no matter how hard or tired you are, you are willing to do it. Not for show, but driven by the love of God. Are you willing to pay the price for the house of God?

Yesterday, that brother had many demons on him, and the demons tricked him into a church with no power at all. He took his work very seriously because they told him that work was his calling. But when he encountered lawsuits and difficulties, no one was willing to help him or lead him in battle. People must remember that you have only one Mingding Destiny, one calling, and that is the Mingding Destiny of Abraham, to be a blessing to all nations! Do not live selfishly in your small lives!

Don't be afraid of offending people, let them be uncomfortable if they are, speak the word of God, and speak according to the word of God, so that people can be blessed! Compromise is easy. Are there any petty people among us who only care about themselves? That is because they have not seen through the essence of life. I long for every brother and sister to be able to guide people through the emptiness of life, and to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and strength is the path that God remembers!

I once served many who were afflicted with filth and mental illness, but when I asked them to serve, they said they had to work and could not stay up late to serve. If I had had that kind of mentality in the beginning, these people would have died long ago. Know that if you love God and serve wholeheartedly, God will surely remember you! Begin to love God, this is a path of prosperity, a path of glory.

God Will Remember Me and Show Me Favor

God! May you remember me and show me favor! This is a word spoken with tears, a word spoken from the heart to God after much hardship and sacrifice.

May God bless everyone!